Life Like Poems
by Lungor Sterling Lycien
Summary: Nate Gray wrote poems when he was young, feeling rejected. He wrote his lyrical thoughts in a book, locked up in his cupboard. What could this book hold? Come in to discover the childhood of a kid who depicts his surrounding, pouring out his feelings...
1. Chapter 1

_Life like poems…_

_Announcement_

Description:

At an early age a boy named Nate Gray started to write poems. Inspired by his surroundings, but also by his own life, his poems show the twists of fate in life, and the many splendored things that makes life unique too… However, they are locked up in a cupboard in his room, and no one has ever heard about it… Would you like to discover the true meanings, full of wisdom, of life?

Rated:

Mostly T but Read FictionRatings for more information.

Genre:

General/Poetry

Warning:

No characters in this story belong to me. They all belong to their rightful owner. Also, I might add that this is the first time I'm writing poems in English. I always do my best, and it will always be so, and that is why I'd like to get constructive reviews, with good criticisms. The next time I'll be doing this, I'll do my best to improve. Also, keep in mind that these poems were written by a young boy (for the first ones) then by a teenager (last ones). Except these warnings, I have nothing more to add. You can go on and… Enjoy!

Release date (first two chapters):

In about a week, or more.

A story of:

_Lungor Sterling Zachary Camille Lycien-Monteith_

Dedicated to:

A very special person, Garou, Tigre Blanc, Jon', l'Italien… And everyone because I think I might forget someone!

Happy birthday, Jajar!

To Starsnuffers too, a great author…

To my family.

And to all the readers who take time to come in this site and to read stories.


	2. Chapter 1: First day at school

_Life like poems…_

Chapter I: First day at school…

Today was my first day of school.

And it hasn't been cool.

The other kids just laughed at me,

Because from fear, in my pants, I just peed.

Even though it was hard going on,

With my family gone,

I tried my best to pretend and smile,

But I was lost and alone inside.

I still remember that dreadful day,

"Ya ain't like the rest of us" they would say…

Then, they would scratch my back then smirk at me,

And after they saw what they wanted, leave…

They're right. I'm not normal.

But being what I am, am I illegal?

Since the day I was born, I was granted nothing,

Just seeing my sky enlightened by lightning.

These words give me Goosebumps,

Knowing that I have to wear an insulin pump.

But I still have friends and family,

Right there, by my side, next to me.

That's all that matters.


	3. Chapter 2: Family moments

_Life like poems…_

Chapter II: Family moment…

Today, we went by the park,

For a walk, 'till it was dark.

We just laughed and smiled,

And this moment just seemed so mild…

My brothers were happily singing

As I was just swinging…

Mom and Dad just looked proud

Even though we were quite loud…

But then my bro' pushed me around,

And I fell and I had a big wound.

I began to cry, running away,

Pushing my bros who were in my way.

Dad came running after me,

And didn't let go when I tried to break free.

Then I understood the meaning of "Family"…

To live happily and to love madly…


	4. Chapter 3: School

_Life like poems…_

Chapter III: School…

"What a big boy, now!"

Yep, just 'Cause it's the big day, tomorrow…

Sharpen your pencils, open your book,

'Cause it's back to school…

Silence is a virtue  
>When they're trying to put me down,<br>I'll just bite my tongue;  
>You won't hear a sound.<p>

I've never felt so alone,  
>I've never felt this alone,<br>I'm afraid of the world  
>And what the future holds.<p>

I beg that you lie to me,  
>Please say it's alright,<br>Give me that extra push,  
>So I can win this fight...<p>

"What a big boy, now!"

Yep, just 'Cause it's the big day, tomorrow…

Sharpen your pencils, open your book,

'Cause it's back to school…


	5. Chapter 4: Middle school

_Life like poems…_

Chapter IV: Middle school…

So many people, so many worn out faces…

So many buildings, so many worn out places…

And because the smirks never work,

They're gonna give some you some drugs.

They all want to know what's running in your head,

So they could rip your aspirations to shreds…

But now you find yourself in-between,

And you're just another one in the murder machine…

And all those boys and girls in the popular clique,

With those awful names that they stick,

You'll never fit in much here…

But if you're lost and hurt,

Everything is just a blur…

Run for your dreams,

Hold onto them tightly…

So many people, so many worn out faces…

So many buildings, so many worn out places…


	6. Chapter 5: First love

_Life like poems…_

Chapter V: First love, new sensations…

You know, every day when I see you,

My heart stops and I don't know what to do!

I and my bros walk the halls at school,

I know, it's casual and cool…

Then you come slowly walking by,

And we catch each other's eye…

I turn around and watch you walk away…

There is so much I would like to say…

Like how you make me feel,

So good, it's almost unreal!

I and my bros walk the halls at school,

I know, it's casual and cool…


	7. Chapter 6: Telling her

_Life like poems…_

Chapter VI: Telling her…

So here is the poem I gave her…

As I tried to keep my vision from blurring…

"I don't want to lead you on,

But just know that I've grown fond…

And until the end of time,

You will always be on my mind.

So why would I keep on dreaming?

School is no cool at all:

I'm not in the popular clique,

And I'm not a geek either.

And if I could be better,

You'd probably be with me forever…

And if I had my way,

We'd probably talk and talk all day…

But everyone knows it's meant to be,

Falling in love, just you and me…

But, for you, I'll be there forever,

And you'll see that we'll make it better…

So, until the end of time,

Please, be mine…"


	8. Chapter 7: Falling in love

_Life like poems…_

Chapter VII: Falling in love…

I Never Knew...

When I met you, I never knew  
>That I'd have to walk with you...<p>

I never knew, I really never knew.

When I talk to you, I never knew  
>Someday I'd have to write for you...<p>

I never knew, I really never knew.

When I smile for you, I never knew  
>That I would have to cry for you...<p>

I never knew, I really never knew.

When I had a fight with you, I never knew  
>That one day I have to fight for you...<p>

I never knew, I really never knew…

You made me crazy, I never knew  
>That even I can't lie to myself<p>

That I don't love you...

You're the only who can put a smile on my face  
>When I'm sad...<p>

I never knew, I really never knew…

I've never loved to be fashioned; I never knew  
>That one day I would have to dress myself for you...<p>

I never knew, I really never knew…

Whenever I go to sleep, I never knew  
>I've to call you so that I can sleep well.<p>

I never knew, I really never knew…

I'm strong in front of whole world. I never knew  
>That I would be so weak in front of you...<p>

I never knew, I really never knew…

I could love someone so deep, I never knew.

And I never knew,

That all my dreams would come true…

It's all brand new…

I never knew, I really never knew…

I never knew, I really never knew…


	9. Chapter 8: Fatherson fight

_Life like poems…_

Chapter VIII: Father-son fight…

Worry, worry, worry through all the pain and strife,  
>I've been wondering what the problem is all my life.<br>Sometimes I wonder, if the problem is you.  
>Whenever you're around skies of gray replace my skies of blue,<br>Worry, worry, worry, I worry that the problem is you.

Words of pain and hatred burn like fire in my heart,  
>But I could never get these words to leave my mouth.<br>You're never there when I need you to be,  
>We're always three worlds apart<br>You try to force me to believe this is what family is about.

Worry, worry, worry you hold me behind cold bars of rage,  
>Never able to speak about my feelings but having to put them on page.<br>You keep me confined in this cage with clipped wings and tied beak,  
>Never for a second allowing me to speak.<br>I wish you would understand how much more your actions tell me about your love. 

But all I know…

You are the cage and I am the bird  
>I pray to the heavens above you'll set me free.<p>

But all I know…

Worry, worry, worry through all the pain and strife,  
>I've been wondering what the problem is all my life.<br>Sometimes I wonder, if the problem is you.  
>Whenever you're around skies of gray replace my skies of blue,<br>Worry, worry, worry, I worry that the problem is you.

Everything I know… 

Worry, worry, worry through all the pain and strife…


	10. Chapter 9: Burning anger growing deep

_Life like poems…_

Chapter IX: Burning anger growing deep…

And whether or not I make the grade,  
>I may love you…<br>And you may be my father…  
>But dear God almighty<br>I can't stand you!

I can't stand you!  
>Always tryin' to be right<br>But always doin' wrong.

I can't stand you!  
>Sayin' you're tellin' the truth<br>Even though we can see your nose growin' long.

I can't stand you!  
>Your prideful attitude<br>And that smirk on your face.

I can't stand you!  
>I wish God himself<br>Would put you back in your place.

I can't stand you!  
>Thinkin' just 'cause you're a man<br>Everybody gonna succumb to your every need.

I can't stand you!  
>The way you look<br>When you make our family bleed.

I can't stand you!  
>The way you're more focused on me bein' a man<br>I can't stand you!

Then whether or not I make the grade,  
>I may love you…<br>And you may be my father…  
>But dear God almighty<br>I can't stand you!


	11. Chapter 10: Anger becoming hatred

_Life like poems…_

Chapter X: Anger becoming hatred…

What an awful feeling,

Of hating your "daddy"…

It was almost constant, when you yelled and screamed.  
>You were vital to oppose my nightmares from dreams.<p>

You scared me half the time, always fighting with Mom.  
>Even my 6-year-old mind knew something was wrong.<p>

You could scare any cat away with your presence.  
>You could scare me away with your dark independence.<p>

You made me feel like my life was a hell.  
>But I hugged you anyway, so you could never tell.<p>

You were never truly abusive; you were just angry.  
>I felt sort of free when you left, even thought you thanked me<br>For being so grown up, and keeping up the house.  
>But I didn't feel grown up. At all. I felt like a mouse.<p>

You stayed for a week, and you scared my girlfriend.  
>But I helped out a lot and stuck by you till the end.<p>

Thought I still wondered if you and I were really related.  
>...That was a topic that I constantly debated.<p>

...But now that's all changed, and God, I'm glad.  
>'Cause the feeling, it's an awful one, of hating your own Dad.<p>

What an awful feeling,

Of hating your "daddy"…


	12. Chapter 11: High school

_Life like poems…_

Chapter XI: High school…

They really don't see  
>How much this affects me.<br>I tell them over and over again  
>But they just don't want to listen.<p>

They laugh and they giggle  
>And tell the whole world<br>YEAH! That's because they're  
>The typical popular girls.<p>

When I put them in their place  
>They go and are two faced.<br>Middle school sucks I hope  
>In high school I will have better luck.<p>

All the drama  
>The haters,<br>Backstabbers, and liars  
>You got to pick your friends<br>Like you are walking on fire.

I used to have one good friend  
>That was there till the end<br>Then he got a girlfriend  
>And now it's a never again.<p>

All the guys,  
>The lies,<br>The rumors,  
>And the facts<br>Karma's a BITCH  
>So you better step back.<p>

Shouting things that don't  
>Need to be shouted.<br>Finding a true friend,  
>Ah ha I doubt it.<p>

Screaming in your face  
>Just want to kick their ass,<br>Do it  
>You're done<br>Now walk away with some class.

Flirting is not so bad  
>It's a sigh of affection.<br>Fighting in the hallways  
>Automatic DETENTION!<p>

Walking around  
>All alone<br>Gives you time to think  
>All the strength you've grown.<p>

Now that I'm stronger  
>I'll fight and defend<br>Because I'm a true boyfriend  
>And will always be there in the End.<p> 


	13. Chapter 12: Opening of the mind

_Life like poems…_

Chapter XII: Opening of the mind…

In fact, it is fake… Everything is just so fake…

When I think about it for just a second…

It all just seems so FAKE. This idea that, good things happen to good people, and there's magic in the world, and the meek and righteous will inherit it. There are too many good people that suffer for something like that to be true. There are too many prayers that get unanswered. Every day we ignore how completely broken this world is. And we tell ourselves "it's all gonna be okay, you're gonna be okay," but it's not okay. And once you know that, there's no going back. There's no magic in the world. At least not today, there isn't.

And plus…

Have you ever realized one important thing…?

That we are living in the world of fake?

Unexpected dangers… Fake smiles… Fake words… Fake promises… This world is so weird… For the simple reason that we don't know exactly what's right. We only partially know what's wrong, even though that fine line between right and wrong is getting thinner and thinner every day… And so we are like constant gardeners, standing, looking, observing… Thinking that the world's changing when we stay the same… And cannot help it but sometimes we have to do something about it… To help ourselves to not be encaged, broken, and lost along the way… And if a great power does exist, I think that he might be disappointed in us… And left us in the darkness. But is patiently waiting for the moment when we would realize the monsters we have become… Selfish, unaware of other people's lives, only thinking about us… Narrow-minded, ruled by material goods… Greedy, as we never have enough… Fake as we've lost the true meaning of words like "love", "friendship", "family"… But mostly blind, because there are none as deaf as those who will not hear…

One thing that will keep you from being lost along the way: know how to alternate brain and heart. And when you're not sure, listen to that little voice inside of you: it's your inner truth speaking.


	14. Chapter 13: Depression

_Life like poems…_

Chapter XIII: Depression…

Am I a faggot,

For not being part of their agenda?

And the worst part is,  
>Before it gets any better,<br>We are headed for a cliff.  
>And in the free fall I will realize,<br>I am better off when I hit the bottom.

I am better off when I hit the bottom,  
>Before it gets any better.<p>

And the worst part is,  
>We are headed for a cliff<br>And in the free fall I will realize…

And in the free fall I will realize,  
>Before it gets any better,<br>We are headed for a cliff.  
>And the worst part is,<br>I am better off when I hit the bottom.

We are headed for a cliff,  
>And in the free fall I will realize…<br>That the worst part is,  
>I am better off when I hit the bottom,<br>Before it gets any better.

Before it gets any better,  
>I am better off when I hit the bottom.<br>We are headed for a cliff,  
>And in the free fall I will realize<br>What the worst part is…

Am I a faggot,

For not being part of their agenda?


	15. Chapter 14: Brotherly moment

_Life like poems…_

Chapter XIV: Brotherly moment

I have never forgotten…

My brothers,

My friends,

And my heroes…

One more year has passed on by,  
>But don't look back.<br>Keep your head held high  
>For you're missing the most valuable moments,<br>You see...  
>When you are looking down toward your feet.<p>

Walk, if you run, you'll find yourself wondering  
>Why or When<br>What never failed to smile down at you,  
>Somehow, forgot to grin…<br>We somehow took for granted then,  
>The special times we shared-<br>Smiles, smells of home, were there  
>Whenever we got scared…<p>

I ran to and from that place,  
>Yet, never saw that smile.<p>

I look up now, no place to run,  
>And it's been here all the while.<br>I realize late, the things that time  
>Can't allow us to hold for long.<p>

The youngest, the oldest, and all in between  
>Can't return, once time has gone-<br>Take time, hold the moments, in time they slip away,  
>Words one heart fought, with a smile to say.<p>

This year will pass, as the years before,  
>Smile at the life, that you most adore.<br>When time comes and you "forget" to grin, too...  
>Those who remember your smile of love,<br>Will hold heads high, to smile right back at you.

I will never forget…

My brothers,

My friends,

And my heroes…


	16. Chapter 15: Thinking about the future

_Life like poems…_

Chapter XV: Thinking about the future…

Hello, there…

Shadow of my nightmare…

And now, are you happy?

I can't sleep or dream…

I know that always,

You come haunting me every time…

What will I be tomorrow?

It's just what I need to know…

This sick strange darkness

Just seems so bottomless…

Don't waste this precious time,

Just stop this pain tonight…

I'm scared to just think,

And so nervous I can't eat…

Will this pain last forever?

Or maybe never?

Everyone look at me with those eyes,

So scared that I'm capable of lies…

Standing there, by the telephone,

Feeling damn alone…

I looked outside to watch the silent street,

Wondering how my life would turn out to be…

Broken down, like a mirror smashed to pieces,

But every hit leave a scar that won't heal…

I won't say I'm fine,

'Cause I know it's a lie…

I'm all alone,

To know what my future holds…

Hello, there…

Shadow of my nightmare…

And now, are you happy?

I can't sleep or dream…


	17. Chapter 16: Welcome into the adulthood!

_Life like poems…_

Chapter XVI: Welcome into the adulthood!

I am perfectly fine!  
>I'm better than I ever was!<p>

I'm revered,  
>I am reviled,<br>I'm keeping calm…  
>I'm going wild…<p>

I tell myself I'm sane.  
>Yes I am!<br>No you're not.  
>Yes I am!<br>No you're not…  
>Yes!<br>No!  
>Yes!<br>No!

So I raise my glass 'cause I am wrong!  
>And in all the right possible ways!<br>And with all my underdogs, we will never be, never be  
>Anything but loud!<br>And nitty gritty dirty little freaks,  
>Won't you come on, and come on, and …<br>Raise your glass…?  
>Just come on and come and…<br>Raise Your Glass!

Who am I talking to?

…


	18. Chapter 17: Final thoughts of

_Life like poems…_

Chapter XVII: Final thoughts of the teen years…

There are things in life we can't change.  
>But there are things we can do before they happen…<p>

Things in life aren't free.  
>Enjoy life while you have one…<p>

The soul collectors will come when your time has come.  
>Enjoy life while you have one…<p>

There are things in life we can't change.  
>But there are things we can do before they happen…<p> 


End file.
